I thought doing a blog would make for an interesting exercise. In all honesty it’s a little selfish as I’m hoping it’ll work a little like a diary of training and fighting and become a useful tool in reflecting on where I’ve been and where I’m going. In the past I’ve tried keeping a training ‘diary’ but it ends up being a list of diet, weights, times, distances and other measurements which have only served to give me some idea of how similar my fitness is now to way back then. Little improvements in fitness/conditioning are useful to identify but not necessarily that important in the context of my development as a fighter.

What is relevant and important though is how I felt after 6 weeks of hard training, how I felt the week leading up to a fight, how I felt the week after a fight and so on. The emotional context is all but ignored sometimes, but it can make or break your preparation and pre fight mood and overall performance. Also I’d find it hard to actually single out any ‘new’ skills I’ve learnt in the last 9 – 12 months, which sometimes makes me feel like I’m running to stand still. If I’d kept a diary of what I learned/drilled and when I learned it, would it have helped? I think so. I know I’m a better fighter than 6 months ago but I’m not sure I could single out anything tangible to tell you why.

My last fight was against Rocci Williams at FX3 fight night 9 and I took it on short notice. I originally thought I’d be fighting someone else but ended up with Rocci. I felt very relaxed and confident in the week leading up to the fight, my only concern was my conditioning as I hadn’t been working at anywhere near the level I normally expect of myself. As it turns out this was the least of my worries. Before the fight I had a brief moment of anxiety… why was I doing this? Why was I putting myself through this?.. again. I’m sure many fighters will identify with this feeling. However, this time it passed as quickly as it came. Once I saw Rocci in the ring I felt more confident. He looked worried, he looked intimidated, and then he wouldn’t look at me when the ref called us in. I had his number I was sure. We came out, touched gloves and I threw a jab, a 1-2, he countered with a body shot, then bang! I was nose diving to the canvas following a big left hook! I’ve never been rocked before, ever and it was clear I had taken Rocci far too lightly. Fortunately I managed to clear my head and went on to win with 15 seconds left in the round. I talked to Rocci afterwards and as well as being a sound guy we had the chance to talk honestly about the fight, he felt he missed an opportunity. I felt I’d done well to finish a fight from a difficult position. Either way we’re hoping to do some training together in the future.

You don’t need to be a rocket scientist to figure out where the learning curves were in the previous paragraph, but these sort of negative details are frequently lost in the romance of a win and exacerbated by an ‘unlucky’ loss. I’m hoping clarity and honesty about my feelings relating to fighting will allow me understand a winning mentality better… and that starts here.